Looking for some coffee time reads?
Read about how we don't live on a planet at all, we actually live on an old sun...hence why everyone worshipped it.
Feeling peckish? Maybe read about The Man Who Ate Uranium....simply to see what happened.
Spoiler alert: he's dead.
Get yourself clued up on how to take out rogue robot soldiers. Or learn why cartels love employing ex-Special Forces personnel.
Have a mid-life crisis in your lunch break when you realise all humans are part of a battery array being emotionally harvested to power something even bigger.
Turn a piece of paper into a castle? Easy.
Become a spy. Tell God to stop dicking about with all the buttons, realise how much water it takes to chat with an algorithm, or maybe just learn why democracy is the same as being ruled by continuous bias.
Democracy, pah. That's so old hat, old boy.
Learn who is going to die first with the Nuclear Weapon League Tables. Then try and sue the media for making you a nervous wreck about it.
Better still, how about a front row ticket to see world leaders slugging it out amongst themselves?
Read about how the World's Best Gurner is probably the only person in the world who can consistently avoid facial recognition cameras. Learn about how someone went to jail simply because an algorithm thought they looked like the criminal caught on camera. It took 5 months before anyone realised. Learn more about computers turning racist. Or maybe just find out how many surveillance cameras there are in the UK.
Sorry if your coffee has gone cold by now. Maybe try herbal tea next time...it's far less stimulating.
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